“We know what the world wants from us. We know we must decide whether to stay small, quiet, and uncomplicated or allow ourselves to grow as big, loud, and complex as we were made to be. Every girl must decide whether to be true to herself or true to the world. Every girl must decide whether to settle for adoration or fight for love.”
Sing it sister.
Love Warrior is the new memoir from Glennon Doyle Melton, author of Carry On, Warrior: Thoughts of Life Unarmed; and it is pretty great. I am not a big reader of books that Oprah tells us to buy, but the more honest and more vulnerable I try to get with myself as I strive to tell the truth in my own writing, the more I am in awe of people who can really go all the way there. Glennon goes there; she is bitingly honest about herself and everyone else. She holds back nothing (I think) and some of her raw openness surprised me.
A few years ago, despite struggling with alcoholism and bulimia in her early life, Melton was doing well. She had manifested her successful blog into her first book, which went to the top of the New York Times bestseller list. She had a happy family life with healthy kids and a solid marriage and then it all fell apart when her husband confessed his serial infidelity to her. Love Warrior is the story of how they fell apart and how they dealt with the shock and trauma, taking zero shortcuts to healing. It is sad and funny and beautiful, and it will rip open your wounds.
While she and her husband ultimately decided to break up, it does not in any way feel like anything other than a victory. Her goal is to live authentically and, to be as honest as possible, and to allow herself to take up space in this world – all things that I struggle with all the time. This book may not be for everyone, but I learned a hell of a lot.